Still not funny

I'm not going to pretend I'm not still angry and broken hearted.  I'm going to try and explain myself a little better though.   I was in high school when the Columbine shooting happened.  I remember being a little scared, though, as is my fashion, mostly oblivious, and horrified at what had occurred.  I also remember being upset at the nonsensical banning of trench coats and solid black clothing.  We talked about assault weapons, and gun control, and who was to blame.

I don't remember coming to a decent conclusion on that end.   I do remember when some asshat whose name I do not remember decided to tie a fake pipe bomb to the third floor men's (Teachers) bathroom wall.   The fire alarm went off and we were all told to go outside to the track field.  I didn't take my car keys or  my purse, because usually, it didn't matter. We were back inside in five minutes.  We got out there and instead of our usual stand around and pretend to take roll they tried to get us to line up alphabetically.  That's when I knew something was wrong.  We all kind of meandered around compliantly until some said it:  This is a bomb threat.  Then we realized that if it was more than a bomb threat, if there was a person with guns involved, Butch Lingenfelter had just put the entire student body in a slaughter pen.   The track field was fenced, you see, is fenced, and the annex building would, frankly, make an excellent place to shoot from.   Some boys tried jumping the fence, realizing this, and the more cynical among us starting talking about how we were going to beat the person who had done this (if it was a joke) to a bloody pulp.    Eventually, the principal saw what the rest of us saw and just let us all go home.   We couldn't go back into the building yet, it hadn't been cleared, so Brady gave me a ride back to the house.

It took me about fifteen minutes to wake my mother up and convince her of what had actually happened.    She thought I was messing with her until she turned on the radio.  

A friend of mine told me later that she got sent home from school the next day because she was wearing black when she came in.  She had just attended a funeral, even showed the principal the funeral program, but they still sent her home to change.   It turned out the boy who did it was playing a rather horrible joke, it was a fake pipe bomb, and he was not a goth or a member of any mafia or a wearer of trench coats.  He was a jock. 

I wasn't all that surprised.  I was really pissed though, because it just wasn't funny.  It still isn't funny.   It's been 13 years and I still want to slap him for it.   So let me say about all these stupid memes about how guns don't kill people, and people kill people and talking about God help us they're going to take our guns?  It's not funny.  It wasn't funny before this happened, and it's not funny now.

There's nothing about owning a gun that makes you 'free'.  It's a huge responsibility.  No, that pistol doesn't shoot itself, but it makes murder a whole lot easier.   Tim McVeigh did take down a building with fertilizer.  Yes, he did.  It's called a bomb.  It's called chemistry.  It is not called a mass shooting which is what we are talking about.  McVeigh, by the way, was a bitter gulf war vet gun nut with serious mental issues as well.   It's really sad that he ended up that way, and it's even sadder that he bombed that building and killed all those people.   So tell me how having a stockpile of weapons makes you 'free'?   If someone steals them and kills someone, the cops look at you.   If you have a child, they have to be both trained about what to do and not do with them AND you have to keep them out of sight and out of mind so the kid doesn't hurt themselves.   If someone walks into a place to rob it and they notice you're packing before you notice them, they shoot you first.   If you really think it's going to help you defend yourself from the government, you are a stupid stupid person and should not own a gun anyway. 

So why can't we talk about enacting sane gun laws?   I don't watch tv news, but I'm guessing some of those memes are created in the propaganda machine that is fox news and I'm taking a wilder guess that they're telling everyone that the liberals are out to steal your guns.    Well, folks, we're all adults here.  We need to have an adult conversation about this.  No sarcasm, no snark, no dumb tactless jokes on the internet.  

It isn't funny.  It never has been. 

Adult Conversations

Picture it:   Sitting my living room eating bourse on a bagel and drinking a glass of moscoto.   Perfect picture of the quintessential freedom hating liberal, aren't I?

I have a favor to ask:  Forget for a minute that I'm a registered Democrat, an Episcopalian, and friend of friends of Dorothy everywhere.   Forget about that.   I have a favor to ask.    Can we have an adult conversation about guns?  

I don't even remember how old I was the first time I fired one.   I have no problem with law enforcement officers carrying them, even off duty and in church.  I don't own one mostly because it's only in the last few years I could trust myself not to lose my temper and flat out murder some sumbitch that beat up my friend in front of her kid, or hurt their child or otherwise did something to inflame my sense of moral outrage and instinct for vigilante justice.   That's the honest truth, I don't care if you own a gun.  I really don't.  

As long as it's just a gun.  You know, the kind a civilian would have a use for.  In the last few days I've been trying to figure out why that man in Colorado was allowed to buy a military grade assault rifle that could fire off 100 rounds in a minute.  I know criminals gonna get guns for crimes, but it wasn't illegal for him to buy this thing. 

 Serious question:  What legitimate use does a civilian have for a weapon like that?   

Hunting?  Are you mowing down an entire herd of rabid deer?  Coyote that move like cheetahs?   Mountain lions that "don't live in Oklahoma", en masse and heading toward your house in a giant pride?  Preparing for the zombie Apocalypse?  Do you think you're actually going to have a need to fight off the U.S. military?  If you do think that, do you really think this is going to do something other than take more people with you?  

I think the obvious answer for most people is because they can and they think it's fun to shoot something like that.  I want a tank but I don't think it's legal for me to own one.  I also can't imagine how pissed my uncles would be if I took one out to the farm and started blowing up open pasture.    I would like a grenade as well, same premise.  It would be FUN to throw it as long as my target wasn't breathing.   

So can we have an adult conversation about guns?  Mental health care?   Access to it?   

Why the hell I can't buy sudafed without signing for it, pulling out my driver's license and having my purchases tracked just in case I decide to cook meth with it but this guy had 6,000 rounds in his home and no one noticed?  Why I can get a ticket for having a head light out and this guy can have ALL THE LIGHTS out in his frontal lobe where the part of his brain that told him this was wrong used to live and no one noticed?   

I realize we don't know the answers to these questions yet.  I realize this.   Can we please have an adult conversation about guns?    

Please?   

I know guns don't kill people, but I'm having hard time imagining that pelting people with rocks or bows and arrows would have the same impact as the weapon this guy used.   The weapon he had no earthly legitimate use for besides imitating a character in the movie and mowing people down.   I guess the question I'm really asking is where to draw the line.  

Note:  Please comment on the blog.  Yes, I moderate comments but it's mostly to keep creepy dirty spam off my blog.   You don't need to post it twice.  (I get my email on my phone so I'll see it several times a day.)