Ebil Spirits.

We got snowed out of work today. My boss sent me home as soon as I got there. So I did what every good American does with a snow day---I paid my bills (pay day) and then proceeded to bundle up on the couch and watch stupid television for the duration of the day. I ended up on Animal Planet watching a show called "Haunted" and saw ... a demonically oppressed Yorkshire Terrier. I kid you not. The demon haunting the house was bothering the dog.

I tried to find one. There isn't an image of a demonic looking yorkie to be found. It's unfortunate. They're actually pretty cute even if they have just done something bordering on unforgivable. I'll substitute a picture of my dog that I "doctored" for your entertainment.


I think Maddie might have a bit of yorkie in there somewhere, I guess she'll have to do.
Moving on. So I'm watching this and they start doing what I'd call a minor exorcism on the dog. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I've seen the Roman Catholic priest in question on TV several times and I think he'll do a house exorcism for anyone with a camera crew. That being said, provided the dog really was demonically oppressed this has to be a new low. Dogs? Really? You going after kitty cats next?

Judging from some of the cats, I've had I think they may have already done that. Yorkies aside, I'm going to put out that I really do believe that there are evil spirits around. I believe that devils are real. Why? I've seen things, felt things that make me think so. I know, I'm stepping outside of that nice liberal Christian box people like to put me in again. I'm sorry to disappoint you.

Let me make one thing absolutely clear: It is not necessary to blame Satan for things he did not do.

Specifically:

1. Disney movies. I'm pretty sure bored staff are to blame for the bishop's boner in the mermaid movie. In fact, I'd bet money on it. I also don't think they ever thought anyone would notice but they weren't counting on fundamentalist zeal in their hatred for companies that are nice to people who aren't straight.
   
2. Rap music. Human beings have dirty minds without demonic intervention. Seriously.
   
3. Rock music. I have never in my life got up and worshiped the devil after listening to a Marilyn Manson song.
   
4. Crime. I'm fairly certain most murders and rapists are just broken in a way that makes them like hurting people. Some of them, maybe not so much, but the vast majority can be pinned on human nature.
   
5. President Obama's election. Guys, seriously, if he's the anti-Christ, Hell's going to have to do better. His complexion has too many of you on high alert for ways to justify your thinly suppressed racism. I don't think there's a whole lot of actual evil he can get away with. Good stuff the Republican news machine can spin to sound evil? Plenty.
   
6. Dancing.
7. Dinosaurs.
   
8. Evolution. It isn't Lucifer's fault people engage in a weird kind of book worship that makes them think God has to tell them everything. He's the creator of the universe guys, and allowed to have 'trade secrets' that we get to figure out on our own.
   
9. Abortion. These happen for a lot of reasons but evil spirits aren't one of them.
   
10. Tarot cards and horoscopes.

I think if we focus on the things that hell actually does, we'll have a better chance of combating them, don't you? Don't be an idiot. Either way. Don't ignore it until you have lamps flying off the table at your head and don't look for evil in everything you don't like.

Be sober and self-controlled. Be watchful. Your adversary, the devil, walks around like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. 1 Peter 5:8